take my soul, take my heart back.

Halo

2010-09-06T19:11:00.002+08:00

Halo, posting saia kacau semua disini.

Penuh angst.

Lain kali kalau sempat akan saia revise dari awal lagi.

Mungkin akan saia jadikan sarana tempat posting art saia (maybe).

Tidak, ini bukan karena saia sudah tobat, saia lagi depresi sekarang. Tapi percuma saja menumpahkannya ke blog. Dan my feelings are kinda private right now.

Mungkin saia akan pindah ke LJ. Sudah punya akun dari dulu tapi tidak pernah saia urus (karena malas).

Nuff said.

Typography.

2010-06-10T16:02:00.001+08:00

I'm absolutely irrevocably undeniably in love with typography.

updates later.

HA!

ditto ditto

2010-05-17T21:05:00.004+08:00

pure awesomeness.

Good bye good bye my princess
I'll send you on the wings that fly high in the sky
Good bye good bye my princess
Did you keep a long time, but I remember the good bye

Goodbye My Princess - Monday Kiz

Goodbye My Princess - Monday Kiz

Prosecutor Princess [Epicness]

I need a superhero.

2010-05-05T18:53:00.005+08:00

I need a superhero cause I am just a girl
And I have no one who will go
And save me from this world
Come to me you superhero
Cause I am just a girl

The Pretty Reckless - Superhero

Superhero - The Pretty Reckless

The sun has abandoned me.

2010-05-03T15:09:00.006+08:00

I leave the comfort zone of my house carrying my bag in both hands
Every morning I walk this lonely road

The sun has abandoned me and my presence grows dim
No one notices but my heart is crying

Angela Aki-Kagayaku Hito

,
輝く人　－アンジェラ・アキ

what a day.

2010-04-28T23:23:00.003+08:00

---beep beep beep---

content of this entry is officially moved because the author thinks it's amazingly immature and embarassing. Isn't it fantafuckingly fabulous?

So now you know. And you know how the author hates sweet things. Eww, dude.

Entry ended. Erased totally. Will never ever post something liek this again. Blergh. Stupid old me.

And anw. I'm sixteen... whopeee! Now I can actually legally watch some R-rated movies. or comics. Anyway, you know what it is.

HA!

---beep beep be-BOOM!---

birthdays.

2010-04-27T22:52:00.002+08:00

I hate birthdays.

It's as simple as that.

It's not because I hate of getting older. It's just because I simply hate birthdays. Such trivial, unnecessary thing. You'll get mad if someone forgets, or you'll be overwhelmed by hundreds of congratulations.

I hate doing that. I'm just too lazy. I hate forcing to be happy on my own birthdays. I hate forcing myself to smile when in fact, I am not.

Birthday, is simply a day where you must always smile-when people congratulate you. It's not because I do not appreciate them. I do appreciate them, a lot. It's just that I don't like pretending I'm happy. It's not that I'm unhappy because of them-it's simply because birthdays have always been a day where I'm not in a good mood.

Some people are getting overly excited when it's their birthday, and keeps giving hints that it IS their birthday. No offense, it's super annoying. What's the big deal? Sure, it's your birthday. But millions of other people are also experiencing that also. Besides, what would you expect them to do when they know it's your birthday? Treat you like a queen?

Face it guys, girls, whatever you are; miracles don't always happen on your birthday. People simply doesn't act all nicey when it's your birthday. Yes, it's special for you. But IS IT for others?

My advice is, don't expect much on your birthday. Stay calm, act nothing is going to happen, and surprise surprise, you'll get more than what you've expected. Who knows will it be bad, or good?

That is, my dear, for you and me to find out.

suckss

2010-04-27T19:45:00.002+08:00

Tried to do amath. simply gave up.

could not understand a single thing.

my mind feels numb. weak. disorder.

fuck everything.

.

2010-04-27T19:37:00.000+08:00

I feel like I'm dying.

It's been a long time.

2010-04-25T22:50:00.002+08:00

I know, I know. It's liek, what? Half a year? Been really busy, and didn't have the mood to 'blog'.

Hey, I'm moody. What else can I do? Sorry, no emots. I changed my laptop, and had to reinstall everything fresh.

So maybe the next entry?

Anw, I've moved. To another country, another world. Well, technically it's not another world, but it's still is.

I don't know if I've changed. But I felt like I do. And I hate the change. I hate everything here.

I mean, I miss my hometown. It's not like I'm homesick or anything liek that. It's beause I MISS the LIFESTYLE. I was such a laid back kid right there. Yeah, kiddo, I really was.

And here? You procrastinate, you die.

Oh and have I mentioned to you that grade sucks? I just really really hate it when it comes to grades. I mean, what's the point of evaluating people?

And the activities here are so hectic. Sure, they're quite fine. No offense, I prefer staying in my room, kiddo.

I miss my friend. I miss my old habit.
Oh and I haven't watched any animes lately. Will do. Someday. Afraid that I might have to give it up. Just give it up.

How I just cannot imagine it. I felt liek I'm dying. All of my own self consciousness and my real self all being taken away. By this stupid school. By this stupid new world.

And I'm going to change this stupid pinkish layout. This is so stupid. Cutey thingy. blargh.
Yesh, I have altered to the world of darkness, world of emo. Shut up and don't complain. What can you expect having a shitty life?

Face it, life sucks.

Tired

2009-10-10T23:34:00.004+08:00

I'm soo tired I've just been to my cousins' wedding, and I was a guest receiver there.

I had to had make up of course, and what's worse was I had to wear kebaya and high heels.

Ugh my feet hurt so much I'm just not used to wear high heels

Anyways, I need to remove my make up now.

Sorry for the short entry. Been bored to blog.

I'll post my photos later on when I've gotten it from others' hand phone. I totally forgot to bring hand phone today

Chao.

Gosh

2009-10-05T19:48:00.001+08:00

In case you're wondering I have finished my anime list, the answer is BIG NO

I haven't even finished Tears to Tiara.

I'm really in a bad mood now.

Shit

At Last!

2009-10-04T13:22:00.009+08:00

YEAH! At last my mood for watching anime IS BACK! Gosh, I've been like 2 months haven't watched any animes

I don't know, I was just really not into the mood of watching animes And there was like totally 60 episodes in my hard drive, which increases each week and can you imagine that?

I've finished watching East of Eden. And hell it is one a hell of epic anime I just can't wait for the movies' premiere because you know, the ending was kinda hanging

Anw, I'm downloading the rest of Hanasakeru Seishounen's episodes, and 07 Ghost, and Canaan, and FMA Brotherhood, and Umineku no Naku Koro ni... I think I will die of too much dose of watching today

First thing first I think I'm in the mood for action so maybe I'll finish up watching FMA Brotherhood till the latest episode, or even Tears to Tiara, or even 07 Ghost... Gosh they just keep piling up

Need to go now if I want to finish all of this today, because you know there's like religious activity in my house today at 7. So I won't be able to watch that around that time.

I'm one hundred percent sure I'll overdose

Bye... for now

PS: I'm hungry

PPS: I think I'll upload some screencaps later.

Stories

2009-10-03T21:05:00.010+08:00

I'm making a new story now on Wattpad, my old story... I just lost interest of it. My ideas are just completely blank.

And you know, I always have weird dreams Weird as really freaky, and sometimes superb! Once I dreamed as a man. Yes, a man. Can you imagine that?

What's more strange was I was married! Yesh, married to a woman and we even had a kid And there was another dream where I was killed by a mummy. No, I did not watch the Mummy movie the day before nor in that week.

Those dreams just kinda pop into my head like that! It was a hell lot of fun you know? Even though I admit it was kinda weird too

Anw, back to stories. I had a dream today. And I was a vampire! And again, NO I did not read Twilight the day before or read or even watch anything connecting with vampires. What's weird though, I was like a 'new vampire' kid who got into a castle and there was a very handsome young guy. I did not know how handsome he was because it was all really blurry and all I could remember was one fact: he was terribly handsome.

And I wasn't the only one 'new vampire kid' in the castle. There were lots of kids, and there was this blond girl besides me. She was kind of quite nice to me, I think.

Then all of a sudden I called this young handsome guy "Dad." Weird huh? I mean HE WAS IN THE SAME AGE AS ME! I was seventeen in my dream, btw.

I don't know why but in that dream I just knew that he was not my real 'Dad'. He tested us each one, which I was lazy to explain because it's really weird and... never mind. It's just after that he said harsh things to me. Well, not exactly harsh, but he was really strict. And I kinda rebelled him! Then he said a really cold sentence towards me which I totally forgot when I woke up!

Anw, back to the dream, I kinda stressed out. Because I just found out I was a vampire and now I have a Dad in the same age as me? WTF? Well he maybe IS older than me, but technically he's seventeen also, right? So I just ran away, and ran through the corridor, I made some excuse I wasn't feeling well and wanted to go to the bathroom, but instead I just ran away.

Totally. I ran through long dark halls, with red carpet. You know, those settings in an old castle... And what's awesome was I ran REALLY fast! Like those vampires lightning speed when they run What's more cool was I climbed down the castle walls, like spiderman! Well, not really like spiderman, but kinda like those mountain hikers when they go down a cliff, but without a rope!

Theeen, no one wasn't really noticing me away. And I was really glad not to be found out. Just when I found a hole, a big draining hole to the sewer, a vampire girl screamed "SHE RAN AWAY!" Great. *note sarcasm*

Adrenaline rush.

I totally panicked and jumped to the 3 feet tall wall besides me and ran over the street. It was exhilarating jumping that high! Like riding roller coasters. I ran really fast, and in a blink I was in a different setting of a neighborhood, and I just knew that it was my home. Before I was a vampire.

Then this guy came, which I knew I loved him.

A crush on him to be exact, and he showed two pointy canines.

Then I just woke up.

Sadly, it kinda ends just there I think I'm going to write this story in months you know, possibly because I am really going to finish this story.

I kinda have the ending in my head. I just wrote this here because I forget things easily. So this is just in case I forget what story it is. I still don't know the girls' name, and the boys too! Yes, BOYS! Those two handsome vampire boys But at least for the girl, I already have her image in my mind. I mean, I cannot look at my own face in my dream, nor I can remember what I looked like. So I was searching for pictures in the internet just for to be the main character. I just want to be really serious in this story.

Here's the girl, beautiful eh?

No ripping or using this story ok? If you do, I'll know, and I'll rip you apart.

©Natsuki

I'm addicted to Wattpad stories now! Here's some great authors with one of the best stories on Wattpad!

And please do check mine!

Natsuki.

I guess I'll be reading more stories now on fiction press! It's another great website, which is on another time

I'll recommend some great authors over there! Gosh, they're just so talented

Adieu~

Internet Sucks :/

2009-10-03T13:41:00.005+08:00

Gosh, I don't know why but my internet REALLY sucks today
It's like loading a single page for one hour and it still won't finish loads!

Anw, I've been wandering around the net to look some cute phones, I mean it. They're REALLY SUPER UBER CUTE!

Look at this Lollipop Phone!

I totally love the pink one

Another picture<3

Specifications:
- 2.8 inch TFT display
- resolution 240 x 400 pixels
- 1 main camera on the outside (3 mp) + 1 secondary camera (1.3mp) inside the phone
- The main camera contain autofocus feature
- A slot for memory card
- Measurement: 106.5 x 51.5 x 13.4 mm
- Weight: 92g

But the problem is... it hasn't been out yet in Singapore! I mean, come ooon! I really like this phone. Though I'm still worrying on it because they say LG Phones aren't 'long lasting' and break easily

I do heard some news that this phone will be out in around November though! I just hope that this news is REALLY true

I'm also searching news on whether we will get a free upgrade of windows7 if we buy it now. I know there's this upgrade campaign thingy, but I don't know whether it's free or not I hope it's free, because no way I'm going to pay more!

Anw, I have to go now I think, I'm going to cut my hair and curl it again. It supposed to be earlier today but I was too lazy, lol.

Ta taah.

YEAH!

2009-10-02T19:40:00.007+08:00

It turned out to be piece of cake The chem quiz, I mean! It was only like a practice and we can even see the book
Ohmigosh what did all of those stressed thing for
A little bit disappointed, but oh well.

Anyway, I felt bad feeling happy like this while there's like hundreds of people dying and trapped under the buildings that collapsed on West Sumatra's earthquake. It has been two days, and oh God. When I looked at those victims, I felt really bad for them

I think I'll ask my mom to donate for them. Well that's because I also have a family over there. Kinda like my aunt. I don't really know them well because my family is SO BIG

Anw, I'm re-reading The Bride of Water God manhwa now, it's a really nice Korean manhwa. I mean it! The drawing is totally unspeakable. Epic. I was stunned when I saw the drawings a year ago

I haven't read it like in a 3 months or so, and now it's been until very far. And I totally forgot what chapter was I into So I decided I would like to re-read it! Hey, re-reading an epic manhwa is undeniable right? Oh and Rara, my friend, my best friend now I think, decided we would like to go to Kuta tomorrow!

It's a part in Bali which is really famous for it's tourism spot and it's beach. But we won't mind the tourism or the beach! What we aim for is the SHOPS! YEAH! We'll SHOP TILL WE DROP TOMORROW!

Well it's just a plan though, which is I also hope truly would come true Anw, I'm really hungry now so I guess I'll have to go to eat~ and continuing reading the manhwa.

Adieu

Chem Oh Chem

2009-10-02T12:41:00.006+08:00


And thus I clothe my naked villainy With old odd ends, stol'n forth of holy writ; And seem a saint, when most I play the devil.: William Shakespeare

If you think I've studied chem, the answer is a big no. In two hours the quiz will start
Damn I just hate "Rules of Reactions". I cannot define which one is salt!

I just need to remember those rule of reactions ASAP

Yes, this is another two new packs of emoticons. Too stressed to say this is cute too and too stressed to add the credits. Maybe after I finished the quiz later when I got home

It's one o'clock in the afternoon. Kinda ironic right? The last time I wrote an entry was also today at 1 AM.

*sighs*

I guess I have to study now I kinda say that a lot ._.

Maybe I'll post another entry later on at night.

Bye

Pheeew

2009-10-02T00:59:00.005+08:00

I'm really tired now I've just finished doing the two math tests. They were... quite hard and there were about 2 or three questions I couldn't answer

And I haven't studied Chem yet either
*sighs* I guess I'll have to study tomorrow early in the morning, I don't know if I will be able to wake up, though

It's 1 am in the morning now, I need to sleep because my doctor doesn't allow me to go to sleep. It's because I sleep late, that my allergies have gotten worse

I hate allergies too, they're just... annoying

Btw, do you see this new smilies? They're sooo cute too I totally digs them. Oh well I'll credits these smileys tomorrow if I remember to

As I've said in my post before, I'm completely addicted to cuteness, kawainess or whatever it is. So I saved A LOT of pixelarts, and emoticons. Tons of them to be exact

THEY ARE JUST OMG SO CUTE!

Gosh, I think I'm going a little bit crazy here, Anyways, what was pain in the ass was that I had to save the manually. YES. That means I HAVE TO DRAG THEM WITH MY MOUSE each time!... And there were like 2000 tiny images?

I died.

...Totally, and I think my mouse is broken too

I guess I really need to sleep now. Ta taah

Ooh, ooh almost forgot! I changed my banner! Please change them in your website too

Addiction

2009-10-01T12:20:00.007+08:00

It's official, I'm completely addicted to cuteness and pink I don't know why but I just love them lately!
Btw, Isn't this emoticons cute? XD Do not rip! I found them by mistake, and ohmigosh, it's just so cuuute Even if you ask, I won't give you

A few days ago, at last SCGS mailed me to send the copy of my passport details. Took it long enough!

Dear scholars
I am Mrs Lim from Singapore Chinese Girs' School. In March this year, you all have been offered a scholarship to study in Singapore. We have been waiting for you to send us your passport details so that we can book airtickets for you to come to Singapore. But until today I have not received anything from you girls. I am now going to confirm airtickets and need your passport details immediately. Please fax or email me a copy of your passport or your ticket cannot be confirmed.

You can fax to (65) 62523076 or email me a scanned copy at this address.
Thank you.

CONFIDENTIALITY: If this email has been sent to you by mistake, please notify the sender and delete it immediately. As it may contain confidential information, the retention or dissemination of its contents may be an offence under the Official Secrets Act.

When I read that, I was really really shocked I mean, I've never heard ever that I should send out my copy of passport
Luckily, I wasn't the only one I don't know what to do if I was the only one who didn't send the copy of the passport

Btw, I don't want today becomes tomorrow Tomorrow is Chemistry test! And damn, I hate chemistry, I mean it's really hard, I have to remember the fucking balance rules
I hate... salt

Anyway, I don't want to remember that now, it will only makes me depressed more and more

I VAIO!

I mean, their CS laptops are just, uber cool!
I love the pink keyboard

I also want a sony cybershot T90 of course the color is also pink

Anyway, I need to go now, shit why does time travel fast? I need to do TWO homework, well not actually homework, but more like math tests

Mr Haresh is so evil! He gave me two tests! Can you imagine that? And what's more tomorrow will be the chemistry quiz! ARGH

I guess I'll have to wake up late tonight

I need to go now so, I guess adios

Wish me luck

Re-start, Re-fresh... whatever it is

2009-08-28T01:16:00.007+08:00

As the title said, restart.
Restarting LMM actually. Le Monde Mystique is my site where it has a RolePlay Forum.
*sighs

Anyway the account got suspender by 000webhost because I did a mass PM. I admit it was my fault I did not read the TOS. But anyway the TOS states that NO MASS EMAIL. And so I thought mass PM was ok. Turns out to be NO.

And I didn't even have the chance to backup it *sighs
I talked with the other members and asked them of their opinion, and THANK GOD they want to start fresh! XD
OMG THEY'RE SUCH A NICE PEOPLE! I LOVE YOU NEKO SAI NAJI /kis /kis /kis
I would give you all of my love♥♥♥

LOL

Anyway, that made me irritated so I decided to just BUY a website instead of getting those free junks or whatsoever.

We decided LMM to be totally ENGLISH, yesh and not Indonesian language anymore.
And I said to them that I did not want the 'uh-not-so-serious' thingy because this time it's a paid website.
Paid means money and money means it's not easy to get. I want them to be really serious, and if more, work on another project under the name of LMM.
I mean I don't want to waste my money for just crap things♥.

And I decided to put some ads in the main website, not in the forum of course just to earn some money, and maybe I'll ask my mom to make me a bank account♥.

So anyway, we decided to make a translator group from English->Indonesian. And for a start we start translating Kuroshitsuji first. I have asked Bleach Asylum for their permission using their scanlation, and wish me luck please♥ I hope they say YES.

I tried one page only just to see where is my ability and am I able to do it.

I don't know I just seem to want to make CHANGES lately. I mean I want to be more SERIOUS.
It's like I got a slap on my face to do things better. Maybe for studies not yet, lol. But for other things, YESH.

I want to improve my drawing *that's for sure*, I want to earn money *stupid me, lol*, I want to learn web scripting *It's hard but I want to*, I want to make LMM bigger *this is for sure too*, etcetcetc.

I want to improve while I still can. And I will start from today on. Today and till my death comes♥

Wish me luck guys♥
~~Oh and I put in a new chatbox♥~~ nevermind, cbox is CRAP they wont load and refresh. Oh well, back to shoutmix I guess...

Nakayoshi's New Series

2009-07-22T01:28:00.005+08:00

Hey guys, you know I don't really like the series in Nakayoshi nowadays because it's too childish for me =_=
But you know what's great? NEW SERIES. And of course great one too.
So tadaaah~

Watashi ni xx Shinasai!

Author: TOOYAMA Ema
Length: 0 Volumes (Ongoing)
Scanlator: Nagareboshi

In class, she’s a sort of zoned-out girl, and he’s the year one class’ most perfect, good-looking guy.
But the two of them have a secret, and their extraordinary “love experience” will start now!

Download Links
Chapter 1 by Nagareboshi
Chapter 2 by Nagareboshi
Chapter 3 RAW by Xiao

Remember to give appreciation for Nagareboshi for their translations.
And give thank you for Xiao, she scanned chapter 3 first! Give her thanks for her hardwork!

ARISA

Author: ANDOU Natsumi
Length: 0 Volumes (Ongoing)
Scanlator: Nagareboshi

Tsubasa and Arisa are twin sisters who haven't seen each other for three years due to their parents' divorce. They'd communicated through letters, but finally decide to meet each other again.
Arisa, the more gentle of the twins, suggests that Tsubasa take her place at school for a day, just for fun.
However, there are things about Arisa and her school that she hasn't mentioned to Tsubasa--dangerous things.

Download Links
Chapter 1 by Nagareboshi
Chapter 2 by Nagareboshi
Chapter 3 by Nagareboshi
Chapter 4 by Nagareboshi
Chapter 5 by Nagareboshi
Chapter 6 by Nagareboshi
Chapter 7 RAW by Xiao

For Chapter 7 RAW is uploaded and scanned by Xiao.

PS: I DID NOT upload myself nor I translated and scanned any of these mangas.

Quick Update

2009-05-21T23:38:00.004+08:00

Well I've been really busy this past months. I mean, really. All of those final exams.
Argh, it almost made me crazy =3=

gah.

enough about that final exam's fucking nonsense.

Anw, it's official now♥
I'm in love with South Korea♥ X3

I mean, LOOK AT THEIR GUYS! SO HOT! >3<
lol. I think I'm officially a maniac now, lol. XD

Well another 'official' thing is, I'm in love with big bang♥
and now, I managed to search all around the net for big bang albums at almost midnight and tomorrow is another exam day.
So err... yeah, I studied just a little bit, then I pushed it aside. *curse those fucking exams* and went on to search for big bang♥
my favorite? of course T.O.P
he's like OHMAIGAWD. SO HOT. Damn. I may go crazy all over him XD
I mean, yeah big bang is really cool. But T.O.P is so DAMN cool X3

And that proves it. My friend, Dewinta. Well, she's not the type who would be interested in any of those artist guys or even comic guys. And do you know what's amazing? SHE FELL IN LOVE.
YES. She fell in love with T.O.P
Can you guess how many charm does T.O.P has?
XDXDXD

I want to hug T.O.P oppa! =3=

nyah. I think that's enough for now. It's 10 to midnight. And if my mother wakes up, she's going to kill me =3=

adieu!

Boys Before Flowers OST 1, 2, 2.5

2009-04-10T18:11:00.003+08:00

I'm crazy about Boys Over Flowers Soundtracks now XD
They're really really good! Damn =3=
For the series, I haven't watched it until the last episode. But still, the soundtracks are fabulous!

I uploaded this to mediafire, enjoy!
Even if you are not a fan of BOF, try the soundtracks! They're really great~ XD

OST 1

1. Paradise - T-Max
2. Nae meoriga nabbaseo - SS501
3. Algoinnayo - Someday
4. Stand By Me - SHINee
5. Lucky - Ashily
6. Byeolbinnoonmool - Kim Yoo Kyung
7. Jogeumeun - Seo Jin Young
8. One More Time - Tree Bicycle
9. I Know Saxophone (Instrumental) - Lee Jung Sik
10. Dance With Me (Instrumental)
11. Blue Flower (Instrumental)
12. So Sad (Instrumental)
13. Paradise (Opening Title) - T-Max

Download OST 1 here

OST 2

1 Say Yes - 티맥스(T-MAX)
2 Wish Ur My Love - 티맥스(T-MAX), 제이(J)
3 아쉬운 마음인걸 – 에이스타일 (A`ST1)
4 애인만들기 – SS501
5 어떡하죠 – 지선
6 Love Is Fire - 카라(Kara)
7 Love U – 하울 Howl
8 사랑같은 거 –브랜뉴데이(Brand New Day)
9 눈물이 난다 – 이상곤
10 Cellogic – 김영민
11 다가가다 –Various Artists
12 낯선 해 – Various Artists
13 사랑을 – 위하여

Download OST 2 here

OST 2.5 (F4 Special Edition)

01. 행복이란 - 김현중 (Kim Hyun Joong)
02. 가슴이 어떻게 됐나봐 - A & T
03. 나쁜 마음을 먹게해 (Ballad ver.) - 티맥스 (TMAX)
04. 나쁜 마음을 먹게해 (Dance ver.) - 티맥스 (TMAX)

Download OST 2.5(F4 Special Edition) here

Enjoy Guys!

♥Addiction to South Korea♥

2009-04-10T11:43:00.013+08:00

Yeah, I'm addicted to a lot of new music lately =3=
They seems so nice and I haven't got much to do. So, why not?
My animes I've been downloading a past few days, I haven't watch it at all =3=
I don't know, but I do not have any mood to watch animes now. :3
I fell in love with Boys Over Flower OSTs ♥~
They're really nice! I mean it! The songs-they're really catchy and seem to have a lot of soul into it! XD
I love all of BOF OST songs! I like Stand by Me by Shinee the most. It just keeps ringing on my mind all the time :)
Lucky is nice too♥, oh and 가슴이 어떻게 됐나봐 by A & T is really great! XD
I dunno what's the title in romaji, because I cannot read hangul. But anyway, it's really great! X3 I love south Korea lately :D maybe because there's a lot of hot guys there XD
Well, I still love Japan more, but I don't know, maybe some day I'll get addicted to South Korea more than Japan! lol

As you know, manhwa is the same as manga and that goes the same to manhua. They're all just the same meaning.
Manhwa is from Korea, aka Korean mangas
Manga is as you know, the famous Japanese mangas XD
Manhua is from Chinese, (either it's from Taiwan, China, etc.) by Chinese I mean Chinese Language or Mandarin language, so basically this is manga from a Chinese speaking country.

Well I'm addicted to manhwa now♥ especially Ruby Doll.
It's very very nice! The art is amazing♥~ And the story is even more interesting.
Too bad though, they only scanlated it for 3 chapters and I have to wait for the next updates. I dunno when, but I just hope the updates are fast enough :( I'm dying to read more! >///<
Yeah, I can search for the raws, but still >///< I can't read hangul! Dammit =3=
I think I'll put 'learn hangul' in my second what to do list. The first one is of course, Japanese language. Kanjis are really hard!

Anw, back to musics, I downloaded some new Japanese songs♥ they're on the top of Oricon chart♥

It's All Love! by Koda Kumi ft. Misono

One Room Disco by Perfume

PS: I'm uploading all of BOF OST now♥~ When I'm finish I'm going to put it up all here!
Oh and I'm downloading Epik High latest album entitled Map of the Soul
Epik High has been one of my favorite group, they have distinct singing style and they're really nice♥

Whee

2009-04-06T18:04:00.003+08:00

Whee XD

haha, AT LAST! FMA ish back! *goes crazy X3
Yesh, I'm so happy~
I'm downloading it right now, and just cannot wait to watch it!
Lol, yesterday I went crazy. I never ever wanted to go to someplace, and suddenly I just want to! X3 so I asked my mom and my aunt and cousins out.
And there, came my paradise! I went to a mall, and of course honey, I visited the bookstore :). Ah, I'm so happy >///<
I bought ALL yesh, ALL of the Fullmetal Alchemist from one until 18, the latest volume. It's not finished yet, but I've decided I want to collect all of it!
Too bad though, there was no volume 11 and 12 TTATT

But I just love Edward, haha XD He's so charming for me :D and for some reasons =3= I do not like Al, dunno. I just like the bad-ass and crazy type? rofl
Well, the bad-ass type is just more amusing and entertaining for me :)
I love the bad guys >///< especially if he's handsome. lol
oh well, bad guys ALWAYS is handsome XD lol

Well today I did not go to school! Yesh! Well, I actually went there, but I did not study at all. Why you ask? Well, because my religion, yesh the one and only my religion was having a religious trip to Maria's Cave. lol
I'm Christian if you want to know XD Yesh, so only my religion has special right today to not follow the studies. lol. I do not mean to be racist or so. But I'm right, right? lol. =3= I'm just so happy we did not have to follow those boring lessons X3
The weather there was super hot =__=; It felt like dying out there. And I was so hungry =3= I did not have any breakfast, so yeah =__=; We prayed, and visited our late bishops grave. It was quite fun, for me.
And I just went home and now I'm downloading! XD
Oh, and I'm listening to Yui's latest song, Again. It's the opening song for the new FMA XD Oh, it's so nice and cool X3 It's so fast 0.o

Anw, I think I'm going to download Pandora Hearts anime.

The manga is quite nice, and I just love the mischievous main character <3~ yesh, mischievous.
Haha XD, see? I always always fall for those type of character <3

Well I'm tired now =3= I'm going to watch those animes and mangas! XD

oh btw, I wanted to try this for a long time :D

TAG!

1. Two argument topics that would REALLY get you going.
- animes
- mangas
-er can I add one more? XD

2. Two songs you've listened to a lot lately.
- Ai no Oto ~English version~ by Moumon *ish the spelling right? I forgot DX
- Again by Yui

3. Two things you usually get complimented on.
- err wild imagination? lols
- tsunnes =3= yesh, aptx gangs XD always say I'm tsundere =__=;

4. Two things you want pierced on you.
- no!
- no! I hate piercings on my body =3= even on my ears. Ugh. That's just hurts >//< But I would love to see handsome guys wear piercings XD They look even hotter! XD

5. Two tattoos you want.
- gothic curly?
- maybe butterfly too :) gothic one too, of course. Vintage is fine though.

6. Two animals you like.
- Siberian Husky! *OMG THEY'RE SO COOL!*
- err, siberian husky? lol

7. Two occupations you consider for your future.
- graphic designs?
- public relations? I dunno yet =__=;

8. Two things most people don't know about you.
- I'm err, people already know all about me, I think =3= maybe laziness?
- err okay. I admit it =-= I'm mischievous *I think they already know that, though*

9. Two of your exes.
- i dont have exes
-

10. Two ugly names.
- assholes
- bitches

11. Two foods you like to eat.
- fried chicken <3
- french fries extra large! XD

12. Two stores you buy stuff from the most.
- gramedia
- gramedia

13. Two numbers you like.
- 3
- 9

14. Two of your favorite school subjects.
- recess
- english

15. Two things you hate.
- liars
- back stabbers

16. Two people you love.
- family
- friends

17. Two people who should run for president.
- obama? =_= nah, he's already a president.
- me! rofl

18. Two things you do a lot.
- netting
- reading

19. Two things you do in the shower.
- wash my body
- wash my hair

20. Two places you go a lot.
- my room
- my room XP

21. Two hairstyles you want to try.
- anything =__= I just want a new hairstyle that suits me the most =3=
- =_=

22. Two things you want to buy but don't have enough money for.
- vaio laptop
- sony cybershot

23. Two Green Day songs you like.
- what's green day? =__=;
-

24. Two colors you usually paint your nails.
- I dont paint my nails
- =3=

25. Two languages you want to learn.
- nihongo
- french

26. Two instruments you'd like to learn to play.
- CELLO! XDXDXD
- piano

27. Two dream cars.
- BMW?
- Mercedes =_= I'm blind with cars

28. Two boy's names you like.
- him *I don't want to write the name here because I just don't want to spread his name all over the internet* But you should now though, he's on my first list in my friends links.*
- him

29. Two girl's names you like.
- Airii
- Haruka
- Ruuna
- Najika
- Biancchi
*I can't choose any of them. So,all of them are all my number one list :)*

30. Two ethnicities of yours.
- Chinese
- betawinese

31. Two of your favorite teachers.
- MJS *i will put in initials only*
- AM

32. Two best friends from elementary school.
- Edith
- Joshua

33. Initials of two people you hate.
- I don't have any
-

34. Two words to describe you.
- lazy ass
- moody

35. Two colors you want to dye your hair one day.
- light brown
- same as above =3=

36. Two of your favorite seasons.
- SUMMER! lol XD It's in my name!
- winter XD I would love to see snow just once

37. Two hairstyles you usually wear your hair in.
- untied
- letting it free?

38. Two nouns that begin with the same letter as your first name.
- Rain
- Roar

39. Two electives you've taken.
- huh?
-

40. Two people you go to for advice.
- friends, any of them, but mostly Airii I think :D
-

41. Two names you'd name your band if you had one.
- no idea =3= I sucks at giving names.
-

42. Two colors you'd like for your wedding dress.
- elegant white :)
- peach

43. Two types of shoes you like.
- sneakers
- sneakers

44. Two trends you can't stand.
- AFRO
- idk =__=;

45. Two of your favorite drinks.
- plain water
- coca cola

46. Two things people do that annoy you.
- plagiarism
- liars

47. Two things you look for in a significant other.
- idk... maybe they're true self...
-

48. Two things that aren't legal, but you think should be.
- idk
-

49. Two fonts you like.
- mechanial pencil
- arial

50. Two good memories from middle school.
- my classmates!
- my third year! XD

I TAG
1. Najika
2. Dila
3. Haruka
4. Airii
5. Biancchi

So here's the rule: people whom I tagged HAVE to post this questions and answer them in your blog. And you HAVE to tag ANOTHER person!

Midnight

2009-04-04T23:38:00.001+08:00

*_*

another post on the same day.

whew, I'm finally finished. I was too lazy to make a new one, so I just edited the other people's skin. I know... It's not allowed, but this is just for a little while.
Tomorrow I'll change it =__=;

Well, just a short quick update. I really need to sleep now.
It's almost midnight and I need to wake up early tomorrow =3=

cheers.

Hahaha

2009-04-04T21:16:00.012+08:00

=__=

I'm in a bad mood now. Well at least today is the final day of try outs! All hails that! XD lols

What has been annoying me is my mother. Damn. Why she has to act like a kid? She's just too damn annoying to me. ARGH.

FUCK.

Ok. Forget about that.

Now I've been dying to have this:

and this:

DXDXDX I really really want both of those DXDXDX
But if I have to choose, I'll choose the laptop of course XD
Go VAIO!

Anw, tomorrow I'll have to go to the church. Ah I'm lazy =3=
But I haven't been to church since-forever! lol
No choice then =_=;

Oh, I read some nice mangas today :) they at last-updated it, and on the same time! Whooop!
So much for the fun!
D.Gray-man, Reborn!, Bakuman, and Shin Tennis no Ouji-sama XD
Hahaha, Ryoma is sooo damn cool and hot X3 *ish nose bleeding
Bakuman is also, getting tense and more interesting each chapter!
If you don't know Bakuman, both the author and the mangaka are from the creator of Death Note. So I bet you'll like it! Though, Bakuman is slightly 'not angst' or about death and so. =__=
Well, I don't like Death Note so, why bother? ROFL
Bakuman is way better, man X3 all of stuffs are in there, tense moments, competitions, loves, comedies, challenges, etc XD
So, all I could say is 'TWO THUMBS UP!'
lol

Well D-Gray-man for me is a bit boring, though =__=;
I want more action! Where did those cool stuffs last chapter go to? =__=;

Nevertheless, The New Prince of Tennis is so cool X3
It's fun to see Ryoma and the others are back into action! Yeah!
But too bad, the series is now in a comic magazine where it goes out MONTHLY.
Yesh, that means HOLY CRAP for only once a month dose and only about 22 pages =3=

Btw, tomorrow is the airing for the new FMA Brotherhood in Japan XDXDXD
REALLY REALLY REALLY can't wait for the fansubbed version, and I just hope tomorrow it will come out ASAP. At least it has to be fast, because I'm just DYING to watch it X3
FYI, this new FMA is the REMAKE, yes, remake of the past anime. But the differences is the plot is going to really follow the manga thoroughly. And I love it even more. Because the manga-in my opinion is a lot better than the previous anime. I did not like the previous anime's plot =__= even though a lot of people love it.
So, I just cannot wait to watch this series! XD
And what's more is I can't wait to hear more of Paku Romi's voice acting!
She's sooo great and she's like my idol? lol

Anw, I need to sleep now. I think =__=;
And I'm still mad at my mom.
And I still want that VAIO VGN-CS16G/P laptop
And that T700 Sony Cybershot Camera
And I'M DYING TO WATCH THE NEW FMA! DXDXDX

------------------

edit

Here's FMA's trailer XD there are about 7 trailers or so, but I only posted this version of the longest one, so enjoy XD.
Credits the video to random-c blog, my source of daily dose of animes

Fullmetal Alchemist - CM7 @ Yahoo! Video

cheers.

PS: I'm thinking of changing my blog skin again, yesh, again. lol. can't help my moody thingy.

Pink is my life!

2009-04-01T15:11:00.004+08:00

Lol.

Yesh, I know I love purple. But I don't know why, now I'm really really in the mood for pink! >///<

I just love it very much in the moment, lol. I love the sweet sweet natural pink :)
Maybe that's because I got influenced by a blogger. She doesn't know me, but I read her blog recently. And she loves pink, to be exact adores them! lol

Well, other factors maybe because of my new wishlist.
For the laptop and the camera, I wanted a 'cheerful but soft' color at least.
And there was none of them that suits my taste besides pink color.
So, I'm attracted to the color of pink right now, haha >///<

A change of situation for a while might be nice :)
I'll study today, I think... At least I should try to.
I'm thinking if I study hard, then my mother would want to buy me my laptop :P
Too bad though, she only approves one >///<
So disappointing man.

Well today I didn't go to school, haha.
Yesh, I visited my father's grave and we prayed there. But man, the weather is so hot.
I was like dying out there =3=
I got bad mood =__=;

Anw, I need to behave myself now because yeah, I go mad at my mom a lot =__=;
I'm such a bad kid =__=;

Oh, and the novel, Stardust I almost finish reading it. Yesh, it's quite mature for err my age because there are some explicit materials like sex inside it.
But not too much and not too vulgar though. Just some words like touching breast, goes into her, and the author did not explain anymore than that.
And that action, for as I've read so far, there is only once.
And I think It was okay, a soft one. It's a lot-lot safer that those hentais and porns out there. And there are many more adult books that are more explicit than this book.
But overall, it is quite entertaining, the imagination is great.
And it is more suitable for adults. Makes sense, because from the summary is
"This is a tale for adults"
But for me, it was really nice and fine. But maybe that's because I'm used to read adult books. But of course not adult as in vulgar stuff. I mean books that are aimed for adults. Maybe for other teenagers who do not read and like those stuff, they just prefer teen books.

I think I'm going to open up some website now. But I'm not really sure =__=;
My whole body is so stiff, and I do not know why =3=
Maybe I'll go to sleep, or even study =3=

Some New Things

2009-03-31T21:06:00.009+08:00

Good news, I think.

hahaha.

Well I went to EF this afternoon. And after that I asked my mom to go to the department store, because I wanted a new sandals. My old sandals condition is quite terrible. Well, it's still usable, but the skin's torn apart and the color is now very dirty, even if I wash it.

I bought 2 pairs of sandals :) one with the slippers type and one with strings.

This is the slippers type. It's color is pale purple.
At first they did not put in on the display. And of course I did not know >///<
But then I chose the gray one, and I wanted a new one. Not the one in the display because I know it has been used by a lot of people and the size would get bigger.
So I asked for a new one, but none of them were in stock >///<
I was disappointing for me and I just said "Oh well.. that's okay..."
But thank God! I love my mom, lol XD she asked her whether if there is other colors that have the new ones in stock.
And the saleswoman opened the box, and I said it out loud spontaneously
"Oh PURPLE!" lol
I couldn't help it because I love purple very bery much XD
So I was happy and feel so luck :) Thank you, mommy X3

This one, :) for me it gives me the feel of 'elegant but cute'
It's like it is really for a lady. :D
The color is again, pale green. I don't know why but I just love pale colors lately :D

After those feet shopping, we went to the bookstore. Well, actually this was my hidden plan to ask my mother to go to the department store. Huahuahua *evil laughs*

I bought 3 (yesh, three) novels and 1 comic book.

I know >///< these books are quite outdated, but I just couldn't help it!
I haven't bought any 'real' books for a few months now. I just read those at the internet. So, once it a while I want to read real books too DX

Well, I'm very very interested in the Stardust novel :D
I think it's great based on the description, but I dunno. Hope so *cross fingers*
The cover is so nice and sweet :) And I bet Dewinta (my best best friend) would love it very much even when she does not know what this book is this, lol.
Do you know why? Yesh. It's because of the title.
lol, the title says it all : Stardust.
And she is unconditionally very very in love with all things connected to stars.
Well, when I finish it, I will of course borrow this book to her :D
I'm going to tell her tomorrow~

=__= oh yeah. I just remembered, there's ANOTHER, yesh ANOTHER test coming this Friday till Saturday. rawr.
argh. I'm dead meat =__=;

Well At least just this one day I'll have fun and go read all I want until midnight!
~~even when tomorrow there's school~~
duh, forget about school, lol =))

I'm going to read now~
Au revoir!

Sick.

2009-03-31T15:33:00.004+08:00

I'm terribly ill and tired.

Gosh. I know. I didn't follow the GO's try ouy today.
But that's because I'm too tired of all of these.
Come on.
I already had tests these few days. And that's really enough for me =__=;
My hand feels so sore. It's a lot better than yesterday.

I don't know why or how but when I woke up yesterday MY RIGHT HAND WON'T MOVE.
Great.
On the day of my school's tryouts?
I freaked out. I mean, I even could not move my right hand. Everytime I tried to move it, it felt like hell. Hurt so much >///<
And yesh, I cried that morning. Of course I WOULD cry if my own mother forced me to go to school and she was acting like it was nothing.
Oh no.
She doesn't know how I felt!

The pain? Argh. Do not ask =_=
Unbearable for me. At least. Maybe one of the factors that made me cry was my conditions.
The night before I studied er while netting. But I really studied.
Then my head hurts so much =__= a headache. Damn.
I couldn't walk properly. And of course I asked my mom for a medicine.
And do you know what she said to me?
"No. Just go to sleep. Too medicines will only make you an addict"
And I was angry. Completely angry. Yesh, that maybe true.
But I rarely drink those medicine! I drink it only when I feel I couldn't stand the headaches anymore. And she said that? Couldn't she at least look at her daughter's condition?
So I went to sleep. Weeping quietly.

fuck.

things are really annoying for me now.
a bad bad mood for me =__=
I'm back into a depressed mode. And now I just hope my hand would go numb again.

Tomorrow is my father's one year death anniversary. Yes, time travels fast. And it feels just like yesterday.
I miss him now. A lot. Thinking things he would do. I don't know why, I'm not sad anymore, but every time I remember him and his memories inside me I would go all teary. Huh. Maybe deep down I'm still mourning. Saddened.
Just wish he could be here right now.
Maybe I won't go to school tomorrow, because I need to go to his place.
I just hope tomorrow will be a better day, at least. And maybe lighten up my mood for everything.

I think I'll go for a nap now ~~and weep~~.

WTF

2009-03-29T18:14:00.003+08:00

=___=

Hey I intended to study, and my mind went kapoof. And here I am back at my computer again =___=;
Damn. What's wrong with me? A complex disorder of 'cannot live without go online at least for a day'.
And tomorrow is the try out day.

And what the hell has been happening with people?
=__= they're having breakdowns. And I did too. Till the point where I wish I just could go die.
And some people have been feeling that way too.

Ugh. I need to study now. I'm studying Indonesian language now. Or err.. later?
Gah. Just seeing how many sentences are there in one question =__=;

And what's worse I'm having headache. Great, I'm officially dead.

Well, change of topic. I don't want to discuss about those fucking exams anymore =_=;

The reason I haven't been blogging lately is because I'm tired.
Yesh, I'm tired of everything.
Socializing, that's what makes me feeling down lately.
Really down.
I'm tired of people. I'm tired of socializing. I'm even tired to do anything.
Mangas, Animes. They're all like bullshits to me.
I just want to go to sleep and never wakes up.

Yes, I am a coward.
But what's wrong of being weak once in a while?
I'm just really really tired of the world.

Dying, I wish could die.
Yesh, I know I would. But when?
This 14 years of my life is just too long and saddening for me.

Well I have to study now. Even when I could not.
At least I need to read some of it.

At least...

Bye.
And wish me luck, guys.
Oh
And yes, I am a lazy ass.

Gah,

2009-03-19T19:58:00.004+08:00

Not in the mood for EVERYTHING.
That's why I haven't done any blogging lately. =3=
I don't have the mood for FB, mafia wars, tribal wars, or whatsoever.

I think I just need a calm calm time =___=;
I want to just doze off. I feel like my shoulder is REALLY heavy.

AH FUCK. I downloaded a game called CLANNAD.

And it was REALLY big size. And so they split it into 19 parts. Each parts is only 90mb or so size =___=
Well, it doesn't really matter to me.
What matters me the most is THE TIME.
gah. SHIT. Why the heck all of the people have to upload it to Megaupload?
Megaupload sucks man. =___=
I only get 10kbps max, so I HAVE TO WAIT for 4 HOURS each file.
Uh, so 19x4 hours. How much time is that? =___=
gah =3=
And the FUCKEST thing ever is after I downloaded them all and extracted it.
7zip (the one I used to extract) said 'ERROR FILE IS MISSING'
And I was like "WHAT THE FUCKIN ???"
URGH. Damn damn damn.

My butt and my back is hurting DX
I wonder if this is the result of too much sitting and netting =___=;
Gosh. I never get tired of internet except once, and that's just for three days =__=;
But still, even when I was bored of the internet, I kept being online =__=

mumu =3=
I love to say that lately <3

Anyway, I'm re-reading to-rabu-ru now. I used to read it, but just for a few chapters.

wokeh. I'm gonna back to go reading again X3
Hope my dizziness will decrease by time =___=;

Wow.

2009-03-15T22:45:00.002+08:00

Wow.

Look at it.

It's 10.46 PM now.
And I'm still lurking in front of my laptop.
With my ass hurting because of too much dose of sitting.
Oh God. I'm such a lazy ass.

I've decided that I would buy some books tomorrow at the bookstore.
Let's see... I need to finish my 2 pages of -too much- reading list of any type of novels. It's even too much for me.
God.
Let's see what I need to buy first tomorrow.
Oh wait.
The lights are dead, and my mother is sleeping soundly behind me, snoring.
Of course I can't see the list.
An idea came across my mind: Read it with my laptop screens' light.
Absurd.
My mind is getting crazy. I might become blind just by doing that every night.
A few nights-actually.

Great.
Now I'm stuck in front of my laptop.
With an urge to sleep but my mind won't go to sleep.
Ironic.
Let's just watch movies then.

No.
That's a bad-bad idea.
Watching movies in the middle of the night, with my mother sleeping behind me?
Great.
Just max up the volume, and I'm officially a dead woman walking-or sitting at least.

It's 10.54 now,
I barely could see the numbers and writings on the keyboard.
Every time I make typos, I need to stick my eyes out more than ever just to see the writings.
Damn.

I think I need to sleep now.

Cool X3

2009-03-15T20:39:00.005+08:00

WOW.

That was the only thing I could say when I read Reborn! 233.
The bike-IT WAS SUPER COOL! X3

Well, I don't really want the bike because I know I wont be suited to ride it. But just by seeing it, it was really astonishing for me.
It was seen at the end of chapter 232 too, but this one is a lot clearer I think.

And then Tsuna's box animal was so great! X3
Agh, it is really cool stuff!
But I guess because it is too great, it is in berserk mode, and I think Tsuna somehow need to tame it.
And if he manages to, which I doubt he wouldn't manage, he'll be stronger than before.
Just can't wait for the next chapter! X3 It's getting intense~

Well the next thing I did after reading this was watching Soul Eater's anime.
It was SUPERB. Really epic. Hilarious XD
=____= man, they are so crazy but cool <3
I really love SOUL not wearing bandanna, just wearing small hair holder *I'm sorry but I don't know what's the English for bando DX*

Look how hot he is! X3 *nosebleeds*

Well, I'm done watching Soul Eater now, I only watch it until episode 31 and don't want to continue for now, maybe tomorrow because I'm not in the mood to watch it anymore XD and besides, my internet IS REALLY SLOW now. Damn Speedy.

I'm downloading Neo Angelique Abyss right now, and it's sooo great.
Do you know why?
SO MANY BISHIES! XD LOL <3 Can't help it. Bishies is my biggest weak point, rofl. I think the studio who made La Corda d'Oro is the same as this one, because the style is really similar. But I love this main female character more than Hino, though. Dunno why. She's not really annoying for me. At least for now. But I'll keep watching on and see.

see how many hot guys are there? XD
I'm going to have a lot of nose bleed~ Hot guys, here I come~!

Oh and btw, good news for La Corda Fans, they're making season 2, and it's airing around the end of this month.
So stay tune! X3
Can't wait to watch it~

Okay, paradise, here I comeee~ *runs for bishies*

IT'S HOLEEEHDAAAAY!

2009-03-15T12:50:00.008+08:00

LOL.
I understand now where does the word holiday comes from.
Well, this is just my thinking. I don't know if this is really right or not. So, don't really believe it, LOL.

Holiday comes from Holy and Day. YEAH! Holiday is A HOLY DAY FOR US!
We worship holidays!

ROFL

Okayh, *coughcough*
Don't mind my craziness and I'm so absurd, LOL

Well in fact if you think it throughout into this, it started with religious holidays, that's why they say it's a holy day. So, from that expand into what we call paradise for us students, and for those workers.

Anyways, I JUST LOVE holidays!

This morning I watched 6 episodes of Gundam OO the 2nd season from approximately episode 17 until 22. All this time I just downloaded it first and didn't watch it yet because I wasn't in the mood for it and I was feeling so down. And with those complex complicated and REALLY sad moments in Gundam OO, of course I could not watch it.
I mean, come on. I would be depressed even more.
Well, I decided to watch it today because I didn't really have anything to do. So I was REALLY bored. I got quite some mood to watch a few episodes of maybe light or heavy animes. But I wasn't in the mood for reading. Nah-uh.
So I watched it. And did you know what happen? I cried.
Yesh, I CRIED. Damn.

I never ever cry when I watch animes. I mean come on.
But I used to.
I CRIED!
Well, the parts were really saddening for me.
Where there are lovers who love each other and they have to fight each other or else.
The man is Neil Dylandy, and the woman is an innovator called Anew Returner.
They are in the opposite sides, they are opposing each other.
In the end, the woman died, in the hand of Setsuna, my favorite character :((
But he was so cool.
Damn. I fell for him more X3
The moment that made me cry was the moment before Anew died. She is like connecting with Lyle and says "I am glad that I am an innovator. Because of I am an innovator, I am glad I could meet you, Lyle."
Ah it made me cry :((

anyways, here's some screencaps of the moment.

And then in episode 21, it WAS SO COOL X3
SETSUNA IS HOT! Damn. I wanna have him X3 <3

*izh crazy*
Okay, I'll go and hunt some bishies more! <3 X3

Dizzy.

2009-03-14T17:09:00.003+08:00

Well I FEEL GUILTY.
REALLY GUILTY. Whew.
I haven't been into GO for almost 2 straight months.

Because of this feeling I'm so PISSED OFF right now.
It makes me remember all of those past mistakes I've been doing. Even though that's just a tiny little mess I made. It just makes me think I AM DIRTY.

ARGH.
I just hate this year.
Hate is so much.
Yeah, I know it's great to get into SCGS. But I hate it. I don't wanna get into it AT ALL.

I just seem cannot really do it. I don't know if I have the abilities to. But I'm hoping I could manage. I could stand and bear with it.
Just wish me luck guys.

I don't know why I'm feeling so down lately. I just HATE LIFE.
LIFE SUCKS.
FUCK IT.

Well I just wish I could just end this life. Maybe. Like that's going to happen.
No, I'm not going to kill myself. Relax.
It's been my rule that if I want to die, then just hope so. Don't kill yourself.
Because I know it will sadden my families more if I just kill myself.
To tell you the truth, I'm just afraid.
I'm a coward.
I'm afraid for what's waiting for me out there if I kill myself. I dunno why but I have feeling it's gonna be worse than hell if you just kill yourself.

Well here I am.
Just sitting in front of my laptop, while there are millions of other people doing other things. And there might be those who has sadder and more complicated things than me.
But I do not care.
Yeah, I'm cruel. But heck, that's humans' nature to be selfish right?
I have right sometimes just to think of myself. Just let me cry myself in deep deep despair. As long as I abide others' rules, then it's fine right?

I'm feeling sick now.
Just let me weep on myself.
Let me be into deeper despair.
Life IS hell.

I'm watching Psych, that is one of the hell EPIC shows. It's really funny.
Truly epic.
But that only lightens my mood for a moment. And then it comes back.
These feelings that I am really dirty.
Unworthy.

ARGH.

I want to sleep but I know I can't.
I just know when I wake up, I'll be back in reality.
I wish that I can fall into deep slumber forever and ever and never wakes up.

Nothing can ease my pain.

Great Websites

2009-03-11T19:36:00.007+08:00

Okay, I'll post out my list of great websites for me :D
There are tons of them, so I hope it's useful for you guys~

+ Celestial-Star
A website of designs, where 90% full of animes and mangas. There are lots of useful tutorials both for photoshop and paint pro. There are some good quality renders too.

+ Cyber12
A website where we can download fansubbed anime for free. Very useful, and there's the low quality too.

+ Getfansub
Same as Cyber12, but it has bigger database and all of it are in High Quality Videos.

+ OneManga
A website where you can read online mangas for free. Very fast loading.

+ MangaFox
A website the same as onemanga, but it has bigger database, with almost all manga in the web available there. But I prefer Onemanga if Onemanga has one of the mangas I want to read, because of it's too much mangas, the loads are a bit slow.

+ Nihonomaru
A very useful website for animes/mangas/games from Japan. It has very complete search and things. Register to the forum to get a lot more access.

+ APTX 4869
An Indonesian forum of Detective Conan or Case Closed. Very complete explanation and provides us with bilingual language, both English and Indonesian.
They also provide us with links to download the latest manga scanlation.
The forum is in Indonesian and it's a very great community and very entertaining.
Join if you are an Indonesian and love animes/mangas! You don't have to be a Detective Conan lover to join this forum, because I'm not a fan of Detective Conan, lol =))

+ Le Monde Mystique Role Play Forum
Well, it's my forum, lol. It's a Role Play forum, and it's fun. Go to the links to see more information

+ Blog Skins
A great website where we could get blog skins for free without registering.

+ Indowebster
A very good downloading site for Indonesian citizen (e.g live in Indonesia).
Because it has a very fast download speed for Indonesia area only.
Any kinds of animes/mangas/games/songs/movies are available here.

+ Game Faqs
Good resources and guides or even cheats for any game consoles you are playing.

+ Tribal Wars
A great multi-massive online gaming browser based. Head on for details. It is very good :). If one of you plays this, please do tell me :D
I'm in server 30 K83 and my nick is natsuki33.

+ Downloads
Website for downloading legal software.

+ Photobucket
Website for hosting images.

+ Deviantart
Very great community for arts and designing. Tons of tutorials and great images.

+ Youtube
Website for online videos.

Well I think that's all for now :D
I'm too lazy to add more, lol. Can you see, the descriptions get littler and littler? lol. Sorry but I'm just too lazy to write more :D
I'll update if I remember others~

A Poem

2009-03-11T19:31:00.003+08:00

Well I'm in deep deep despair now. A bottomless pit of despair.
Whew. Just made out this poem yesterday, I posted it in APTX4869 Forum too.

Everything is black.
Without any reason I just keep on walking on and on.
Where is the light?
I cannot see anything nor can I foresee
I cannot feel anything
Pain
Misery
Happiness
Joy
Tears
All of it
I cannot see anything
the sun
the moon
the day
the night
Where am I?
How long should I walk?
Am I even alive?

A dot.
A dot that is becoming a spark
Yes,
A spark of light
My mouth curves up
Yes, my desires that's too strong
Searching for what we call salvation

So I walk on and on
And that light just seems bigger and bigger

And everything just goes back
Black.
I'm back again.
At the long black and deep tunnel
Where I cannot feel,
nor see.

Oh thou darkness
Where is my light?

End.

Love Story

2009-03-10T20:44:00.003+08:00

We were both young when I first saw you
I close my eyes
And the flashback starts
I'm standing there
On a balcony in summer air

See the lights
See the party, the ball gowns
I see you make your way through the crowd
And say hello, little did I know

That you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles
And my daddy said stay away from Juliet
And I was crying on the staircase
Begging you please don't go, and I said

Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone
I'll be waiting all there's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story baby just say yes

So I sneak out to the garden to see you
We keep quiet 'cause we're dead if they knew
So close your eyes
Escape this town for a little while

'Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter
And my daddy said stay away from Juliet
But you were everything to me
I was begging you please don't go and I said

Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone
I'll be waiting all there's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story baby just say yes

Romeo save me, they try to tell me how to feel
This love is difficult, but it's real
Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess
It's a love story baby just say yes
Oh oh

I got tired of waiting
Wondering if you were ever coming around
My faith in you is fading
When I met you on the outskirts of town, and I said

Romeo save me I've been feeling so alone
I keep waiting for you but you never come
Is this in my head? I don't know what to think
He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring

And said, marry me Juliet
You'll never have to be alone
I love you and that's all I really know
I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress
It's a love story baby just say yes

Oh, oh, oh, oh
'Cause we were both young when I first saw you

wokeh X3, how's the new template guys? X3 Well, I was too lazy to make it myself all over again, so I just edited the separated time one.
So thank tou for slayerete X3

The images of the photos I got from littlemewhatever.
The brushes are from celestial-star by melfina X3.

Maybe tomorrow or even weekend I'll really make my own skin, nyaa~
Well, I was just wondering, which one is better for the writing on the image?
Where are you, my Romeo?
or
Where are you, my love?

Oh yeah, and credits for the lyric and song in my blog for Taylor Swift.
Such an amazing song called Love Story ;)

Remember to give me some suggestions which one is better for the writing in the image!

Bored

2009-03-10T14:37:00.003+08:00

I'm really bored lately these days, even though there are a lot of entertainment I can do, but I just seem so bored with it. Mangas, tons of Animes that I haven't watch yet. I just seem cannot be entertained at all.

Whew. I don't know what have happened to me =A=
Well, maybe I'll try to make a blog skin. But I dunno, maybe I won't, lol.
Some parts of me want to, but some of them do not. It's just the same lately. I really dunno what to do. I can't sleep, and I just feel so... well I don't know what to say =A=

I just feel like I want to do something, but everything I could do are unsatisfying for me.

Ugh. I'm such a lazy ass.
I'm such a greedy girl.
I'm SO BORED DXDXDX

If there are any suggestions, please do tell me ;)
Oh, and anyone, please just ask me to do something I can do DX It might help me to have an activity at least.

Well...

2009-03-09T16:51:00.004+08:00

Well, for the last two days I took examination for scholarship in Singapore.
I didn't think that I would pass the examination. But they told me that my math was poor. Very poor to be exact.

Oh well, at least I got accepted :))

Then they started to tell me on and on about the SCGS (Singapore Chinese Girls School)
Well, when I heard about it I was not very sure to accept it. I mean, I'm not the type to be very active or so, I'm just a type where I am SUPER LAZY, lol.
And with those disciplines, obligations, etc. I HAVE to be SUPER SERIOUS.
I admit it, that besides English, I was never serious in any studies at all. I seem just cannot be serious into it.

Well, I can't reject it now...
I admit that I feel a little regretful. Well, I'm just so-so-so afraid now. Thinking I will be far away from home and families. And I'll be all alone in an unknown country for me. Completely unknown.

I have to study really-really hard. And I don't even know if I could be online often. I need to fit myself up. I need to be independent. I need to be SERIOUS and just look ahead.

I just hope I can make it...
I don't want to be separated with my friends :(( MY BEST FRIENDS :((
Dewinta, Amy, Dina, Riri, Byantari :((

Well, just wish me luck guys. Wish me luck that I could manage it and could prepare myself really well before going to Singapore :(.

Thankfully, there will be Nurinda and Rara too ;)
I just hope MY ROOMATE IS one of them :((.

ARGH.
I'm so stressed out right now.
There are some parts of me that don't want to go.
But there are some parts of me that want to go.

But it's too late now.
What has been is done.

And there's no going back.

My Blog's Affiliate Logo

2009-03-07T16:08:00.009+08:00

I made this just a while ago for my blog's affiliates.

This is the bigger version of the image

The image of the cute young lady is ©Ryusuke Hanamoto. :)

50 Questions About Me

2009-03-07T14:14:00.002+08:00

1.Primary foto kamu diambil dimana?
- sekolah, nempel di tembok
.
2.Hobi tidur?
- belakangan ini ia, jadi beruang mulu. hibernasi, wkwkwk
.
3.Semalem ngapain aja?
- blogging!
.
4.Lagi ada masalah? apa?
- yep. masalah dengan teman, masalah setress karena besok test.
.
5.Lagi menginginkan sesuatu?
- Graphic tablet and a new laptop :D
.
6.angka 9 mengingatkan kamu pada apa?
- my lucky number :D
.
7.Sapa aja yang tgl lahirnya bareng sama lo?
- nggak ada. tanggal lahir gw cuman milik gw sendiri X3 *rakus
.
8.Lagi naksir seseorang?
- cinta ie. :P
.
9.Pernah nyanyi didepan orang bnyak?
- pernah, nambah jingkrak-jingkrak lagi. waktu itu di depan kelas, wkwkwk. sampe temen pada lewat sambil geleng-geleng kepala dan ngelus dada "Gila." =))
.
12.Ada cowo/cewe yang disuka sekarang ini?
- kalo cowo ia ada.
.
13.Terakhir makan apa?
- Telor orak arik+nasi putih
.
14.perasaan dominan yang sekarang loe rasain?
- Bete
.
15.apa yg kamu kenakan sekarang ?
- baju or, cd, sama bh =))
.
16.siapa yang terakhir telepon kamu?
- mami
.
17.siapa yang terakhir kamu ajak
ajak maen?
- hah? maen dokter2an? *mikir ecchi* hihihi
.
18.apa yang akan kamu lakukan setelah ini?
- makan. harus makan. graaoo! *gilakarenakelaparan*
.
19.apakah kamu memikirkan seseorang?
- sekarang? nope
.
20.siapa dia?
- dibilangin nggak mikirin orang. bego ih~
.
21.kamu suka merokok gak?
- not in a million years.
.
22.kamu suka clubing ga?
- 'b'nya kurang satu tuh di 'clubing'. bego =))
.
23.gmn hub ma ortu?
- fine aja lah.
.
24.kamu punya tato atau piercing?
- nope
.
25.kamu kalo nonton, sukanya film yang gimana?
- fantasy!
.
26.lagu yang sekarang lagi didengerin?
- Eyes on me- Angela Aki. Wuih mantab.
.
27.apa yang kamu lakukan sebelum ngisi ini?
- buka2 web
.
28.apa yang lagi kamu butuhin?
- butuh kepintaran. butuh ketenangan. butuh BISHIES! mukyaa X3
.
29.ngerasa nyaman dgn seseorang?
- yep
.
30.apa yang bikin kamu lebih tenang?
- MASUK ACS! GYAA XD
.
31.Cinta adalah sumber inspirasi.
- bullshit.
.
32.First love never die. Percaya ga ?
- again, bullshit.
.
33.Yang bikin cinta di SMA istimewa ?
- ... masih smp gw
.
34.Aborsi karena alasan pendidikan ?
- mau gw tabok? lo kira gw cewek apaan? buset dah.
.
35.Cinta yang perfect itu kayak gimana?
- cinta yang apa adanya.
.
36. Obat untuk menyembuhkan luka?
- betadin
.
37.Cinta itu butuh pengorbanan, Setuju ga ?
- yesh. ~~tapi gw males berkorban. cuih nggak guna~~
.
38.Sedih karena cinta sampai pingin mati. Pernah ga ? Sm sapa??
- nggak same segitunya ah
.
39.Pacar yang secara rutin cek HP kamu. Menurut kamu ?
- putusin aja. nyebelin kalo digituin mulu.
.
40.Waktu PDKT, baik banget. Begitu pacaran, cuek. Menurut kamu ?
- hah. JERKASS.
.
41.Hari jadian harus diingat?
- hu-uh hu-uh. dulu pernah salah gw, wkwkwkwk =))
.
42.Menyukai seseorang secara diam-diam, menurut kamu?
- apa salahnya?
.
43.Jalan dengan mantan gebetan, menurut kamu ?
- kalo cuman temen no prob lah. tapi jangan berdua doang.
.
44.Cinta dan waktu. Hubungan keduanya gimana?
- simbiosis mutualisme.
.
45.Masih sayang dgn cinta pertama kmu?
- hm.. still...
.
46.Klo pacar km msh suka berhubungan dgn cinta pertamanya?
- putusin.
.
47. Masih inget pacar pertama?
- ya, karna pacar sekarang gw pacar pertama gw =)
.
48.gmna perasaan ke pacar pertama?
- nokomen
.
49.lagu apa yg menggambarkan kamu?
- yang menggoda *apa coba. hahah. yang fiery tapi menyejukkan katanya orang.
.
50.repost ya '50 questions bout me'
- sipsipsip
.

...

2009-03-07T13:58:00.003+08:00

Well you see, my friends seems to have read my posting before about how those anime and a certain person.

I'm just going to make things clear. Um, yeah I think maybe I'm a little bit too harsh.
But I didn't say she's an asshole or whatsoever. I've stated first that the title was just a joke.
That's why I said in my posting before 'Wokeh, I think the title is a little bit too harsh, lol.'.

Well what I was doing was just simply telling her. Make her realize what she's been doing is wrong.
I'm not really furious or whatsoever, yes, I admit it I was angry. But If she apologize, of course I would forgive her.

And no, I'm not posting these because someone told me to. I just felt a little bit guilty posting in on my blog. But what else I could do?
If I tell her directly I bet she's going to be mad at me.
And now she's even mad when I posted this.

She was like not even talking to me. And I was like 'huh?'.
Well I see. I don't want to take any things further. And I just don't like it.

If somebody wants to protests, then do so. But please give me fairly good reason why you do that. Otherwise, I wouldn't accept it without any logical and fair explanation.

Well I asked one of my friend today, and told him what had happened.
He said that it was natural for me to be mad at her. And he said that he would've been angry too if that happened to him.
And thanks to him now I felt a little bit relaxed. Because I'm afraid, I'm afraid to go mad wrongly.
And yes, by wrongly I mean that I'm afraid that I should not be mad at her because what she did was natural thing to do.

Well I'm still in bad mood now. So I'm going to warn you first. I might get irritated really fast, so please forgive me if I go mad without any logical reasons.
I was a bit annoyed too at school today.
Well, I just hate this week. I hate this year. Ugh.

I'm hungry... and I must study for tomorrow, wish me luck guys!
And please do give comments ;)

Oh and yeah, after this I think I'm going to post some bulbos again :D
I'm in a mood for it lately.
Hahah.

Have a nice day guys.

Bulbo

2009-03-06T21:10:00.002+08:00

Baik, saia sedang malas buka fs. Dan saia sedang bosan ngapa2in.
Akhirnya saia ngepost lagi, kali ini ngisi bulbo.

1. Nama ?
~ hm?

2. Arti nama kamu apa ?
~ artinya ya putri , perempuan, wanita, cewek =A=

3. Sapa yang ngasi nama qm?
~ nama apa dulu, panjang ato pendek?

4. Tinggal ma sapa ?
~ sama keluarga lah.

5. Hal yang paling sering kamu lakukan
di kamar kmu ?
~ ngenet, nggak peduli gw sakit apa enggak XD

-------------PERSONALITY--------------

1. kamu tipe orang terbuka atw
tertutup?
~ ditengah-tengah? I'm moody.

2. knp begitu ?
~ ya gitu dah. haha. cerewet amet sih =A=

3. Oooh... gitu yah ??
~ nggak.

4. kamu gampang fallin' in luv ??
~ err. does falling in love with bishies counts? X3

5. Apa pendapat orang tentang kamu ?
~ moody, tempramental. hahah.

6. sahabatmu banyak ?
~ dunno.

-------------ACTIVITY------------------

1. Kapan terakhir kali makan ?
~ barusan. sejam yang lalu keaknya. McD loh, cihuy~

2. makan apa ?
~ ya elah, barusan di bilang

3. kapan terkhir kali mandi ?
~ er... 3 h-hari yang lalu?
A-abis sakit gw! *ngeles

4. kapan terakhir kali chatting ?
~ tadi

5. ma sapa ?
~ uso, toku, kaga.

6. kapan terakhir kali sms orang ?
~ tadi

7. sms siapa ?
~ mo tau aja

8. Kapan terakhir kali...
~ ape? berak?

-------------CONFESSION---------------

1. Lengkapi : kamu adalah orang
paling....
~ males. hahah.

2. kata-kata yang pengen kamu katakan
sekarang ?
~ ...

3. apa yang ingin kamu katakan pada
mantan ?
~ gag punya mantan euy. masih langgeng. moga2 sampe selama2nya. amin :)

4. kata-kata terakhir yang td kamu
katakan?
~ "udah makan tadi kok mam."

5. kata-kata bwd sahabt kamu?
~ airii: wkwkwk. I miss u darls *loh
ruuna: keep strong honey ;)
haruka: eh, hai? *bingung mo ngomong apa*

6. kata-kata bwd nenek kamu ?
~ nenek?

7. yang pengen kamu tanyakan ke ayah
kamu ?
~ nothing

8. yang pengen kamu marahin harii
ini ??
~ semuanya, *ditimpuk.
wkwkwk. ada deh.

Some People Are Just Assholes.

2009-03-06T20:11:00.002+08:00

Huh. Wokeh. I think the title is a little bit too harsh, lol.

I'm just VERY stressed out. My stomach hurts, my head is dizzy. And in two more days I have to take the ACS test. And I'm so very not ready for it.
Heh. I want to scream all over again.

You know, someone has been really annoying me. Why?
Well, I gave her almost all of my collection of anime to her. And do you know what she just did?
She gave it to other people, just like that. Not even asking for my permission a little bit.
Ugh, Puhlease? At least give me some respect will ya? I know those animes are not me who translated them. But I downloaded them you know? With my internet. With MY bandwidth. With MY money.
So why not at least appreciate it a little? At least ask my permission first, or at least tell the one she gave where did she get that.
Do you know how much time I've spent downloading on those all? A LOT.

Then just don't go boasting it all to other people and giving it on FREE without even asking me.
I don't ask you to just tell them 'Hey, I got this from Natsuki and she said to tell everyone I got it from her'.
Hell no. What I'm just asking is, JUST ASK ME. At least ask my permission before just giving it to them.

What she's doing is so rude to me. Especially I WAS VERY SHOCKED when she borrowed my anime CD's and just copied it to her computer WITHOUT EVEN TELLING me.
Hey, THAT'S MY MONEY. At least ask to me first.

This is really irritating me now. Agh. I gave it for free and look what she did for me?
What? I don't care if she's mad at me. I'm the one who's supposed to be mad at her.
Look at what she's done to me?

Can you imagine for one example. You got a recipy. A very precious recipy from your grandmother. You showed it to her, and she wanted a copy. So you gave it to her, because you think of her as your very own best friend. Then she, without even telling you copied the recipy, YOUR OUTMOST PRECIOUS recipy from your dear grandmother to other people.
Fury. That's what I can tell. Of course you'll be angry.
And that goes the same for me too.

This makes me think again. People really do not know how to appreciate people, eh?
Anyways, I'm in a really badmood lately. Those exams coming on me, and I've only just studied very little, and now THIS?

School: What A HELL.

2009-02-04T18:31:00.003+08:00

ARGH. I'm just so tired with all of these activities from school! Can you imagine I have to go home almost every day at 5 PM? And what's worse, they give you a lot of tests. And yes, by I mean a lot, is A LOT. Two to three tests every month, and it has to be extremely good, or you'll have to do a remedial. What makes me more tiring, after those crazy school, I have to go for courses.
Well. That's hell for me. For just a 9th grader.
What makes me even sadder, this 9th grade, I know I'll not be in the same way as my other friends :((
I just couldn't imagine my world without them :(( It has been almost three years now. And all of them just seems to be my real best friend :((
I also really do not want to separate ways with my bf :((
Argh. It's so depressing.
Well, there was a lot of funny things happened lately, but I just can't put it all into here.
Tomorrow I'll have intensive tests. Yes, ANOTHER test *cries*
Anyways, me and my best friends are becoming crazier and CRAZIER by day =))
I just LOVE all of them! XD
YEAH!
9A RULES!
And I especially do love you honey :-*
lol

Well, I just wrote this to lighten up my mood ;)
And it worked! :) I love you too, my bloggie :D

Special thanks to:
D&D, you guys made my day ;)

PS: Dina-tunggu kelanjutan coretan indahku! HYAH! *ambil spidol 3*
Winwin-psst, jangan sampe ketauan pak tompi lagi yyu =))

Merah dan Hitam

2009-01-28T21:34:00.000+08:00

Your thirsty lips
Appear to be frozen
Expose them

"Tsk."
Lo bego.
Ren menatap langit kelam dengan pandangan yang sama kelamnya.

Air.
Air menetes satu demi satu dari langit. Seperti langit yang sedang menangis, seperti surga yang mengutuk hari ini.

Overflowing tears
Drip from radiance
They keep following me

Ren terdiam bisu, tetes-tetes air perlahan mengalir di mukanya.
Entah.
Entah itu adalah tangisannya, atau hanya tetesan hujan yang jatuh ke wajahnya.
Tidak ada yang tahu.

Ya, tidak ada yang tahu selain Ren.

Sesosok wanita.
Matahari,
Ya, wanita itu bagaikan matahari.
Wanita itulah penerang Ren.
Membawa sinar ke dalam kegelapan, membawa harapan.

There weren't enough
Safe places like that
I was seeking for you
Our fingers touched each other
Transmitting and gathering up
Only heartening feelings

Suara tawa samar-samar terdengar
"Hmph. Mengapa wajahmu kusam seperti itu?"
"Ya. Ini memang diriku."
"Tapi kurasa tidak. Sikapmu tidak mencerminkan penampilanmu."
"... Penampilan?"
"Ya, penampilan. Rambut merahmu, mata merahmu. Kau harusnya lebih... merah?"
Tawa kembali terdengar, tawa yang berbeda.
"Aku pikir aku sudah cukup merah. Merah cocok dengan hitam kan?"
Tawa sarkastik.
"Tapi hitam hanya mengotori."
"Aku sendiri hanyalah dosa."
"Ren..."

Wanita itu membawa matahari.
Ya, matahari yang menyinari,
Menyinari dan menarik,
Menariknya ke dalam kegelapan yang paling dalam,
hanya sekejap.

Surrounded by pulsing
I decided to uncover my
Hidden desires
But even so
My memories and
Your lost face still
Remain as they are

"Kau bodoh Ren."
"Ya, aku memang bodoh."
"Dia hanya lebih menarikmu ke dalam kegelapan."
"Tidak."
"Ya, tidak. Dia menyeretmu kedalamnya."
"Tidak."
"Jangan menyangkal Ren! Akuilah saja, dialah yang membuatmu semakin terpuruk!"
"DIAM!"
"Tidak. Aku tidak akan diam. Aku tidak mau melihat adikku sendiri. Oh-adikku yang malang menderita seperti ini. Hanya karena wanita terkutuk itu."
"DIAAAAM!"
"Dia sudah pergi Ren. Itu bukti. Dia meninggalkanmu."
"T...tidak.. Itu... bo..bohong! Itu dusta!"
"Jangan menangis Ren. Jangan menangis karenanya. Wanita itu tidak pantas untukmu."
"Tapi aku mencintainya."
"Lalu? Dia meninggalkanmu, sendiri."
"Pergi. Kau hanya mengotorinya lebih jauh lagi."
"Tapi-"
"Pergi. Biarkan aku sendiri."

Hitam.

"Hei Ren."
"Hm?"
"Bagaimana kalau aku... aku pergi?"
"Tidak akan."
"Ya, tapi kalau seandainya begitu?"
"Maka aku akan mengejarmu. Sampai ke neraka sekalipun. Kemanapun kau pergi."
"Tapi tidak Ren."
"Tidak?"
"Berjanjilah padaku, satu hal saja."
"Tidak. Pasti ini ulah konyolmu lagi, aku tidak akan terjebak olehmu."
Wanita itu tertawa.
"Tentu saja tidak Ren. Aku serius."
"..."
"Ya?"
"Baiklah. Satu. Hanya satu."
"Tentu saja." senyum wanita itu mengembang.
"Lalu?"
"Berjanjilah padaku. Seandainya aku, aku pergi... Kau tidak akan mengejarku... Kemanapun aku pergi."
"TIDAK! Hanya satu hal itu saja yang tidak aku bisa janjikan denganmu!"
"Tapi Ren... Aku tidak mau kamu menderita karenaku."
"Bukankah itu malah lebih membuatku menderita! Aku tidak bisa membayangkan duniaku tanpamu."
"Humans wither, Ren. Suatu saat... Ya, suatu saat kita pasti akan berpisah..."
"Tidak. Aku tidak akan pernah membiarkanmu pergi. Tidak. Kaulah cahayaku."
"Jangan menangis Ren. Tersenyumlah, tersenyumlah untukku."
"..."
"Aku percaya Ren. Percaya kalau kau akan bisa hidup tanpaku. Kau akan bisa menemukan cahayamu."
"Tidak. Kaulah satu-satunya cahayaku."
"Tapi Ren-"
"Baiklah. Aku berjanji. Tapi kaulah cahayaku satu-satunya. Kaulah pembawa 'merah' dalam hidupku. Kalau kau hilang, maka 'merah' itu akan juga pudar. Hilang ditelan 'hitam'."
"Tidak Ren! Aku tidak mau kamu menjadi seperti itu!"
"Lalu apa? Apa yang bisa kuperbuat tanpamu? Biarlah kupasang topeng. Biarlah aku bisu. Tanpamu dunia hanyalah kebohongan."
"Aku tidak akan meninggalkanmu Ren. Tidak akan pernah."
"..."
"Hati. Ingatan. Aku akan selalu ada di lubuk hatimu paling dalam. Aku akan selalu berada di dalam ingatanmu, Ren. Aku akan selalu hidup di dalamnya, memelukmu dengan kuat."
"Tapi kau tidak bisa muncul di depanku. Aku tidak akan bisa memelukmu."
"Ren... manusia pasti akan pergi. Siklus itu tidaka akan pernah berhenti."
"Lalu apa?! Apa yang harus kuperbuat tanpamu? APA?"
"Hidup. Teruslah hidup demi aku Ren. Berjanjilah kepadaku."
"Cukup. Aku tidak sanggup melakukannya."
"Kamu sanggup. Kamu kuat Ren."
"Kuat karnamu."
"Ren! Jangan pergi!"
"..."

...

Malam itu... juga sama akan hari ini.
Hujan menjadi saksi semuanya.
Sudah tiga puluh menit Ren berdiri, terdiam bisu dibawahnya.
"Hei." Ren tertawa sinis "Lo lihat kan? Gw akan tepati janji kita."
"Gw bakal hidup. Gw bakal mengenakan topeng 'merah' itu."

Merah milikku palsu.
Semuanya karnamu.
Hitam menguasaiku.

Forever within the darkness
Like crimson, swaying embers
Even in armor-clad hearts
Smouldering thoughts do not go out

---

Well, saia sedang gloomy =A= entah kenapa pingin buat fanfict kelam seperti ini modelnya. Haha... *tertawa garing*
Anyways, err. Saia tau fanfict ini membingungkan. Karena ada banyak 'flashbacks'nya.
Jadinya yah, agak pusing mana yang 'sekarang' dan mana yang 'dulu'. Lalu yang mana artinya 'pergi'.
Well, it's up to you guys. Kalian mendefinisikan 'pergi' yang mereka bicarakan seperti apa.
Anyways, credit for the english writings from a song entitled Strength and Aka to Kuro.
Comment please~

Insanity, loves it :3

2008-12-22T19:16:00.004+08:00

Lol, a few days ago I was reading Sarah's book entitled BABI NGESOT *I always mistaken it by calling it BABI NGEPET, lol. FYI: babi ngepet means werepig, and babi ngesot means a pig without its legs*
Well, I was reading it happily, when suddenly there was a grumbling sound. I looked my left, no one I looked my right, my friend was just playing cards and reading comics.
WTF? Who's the hell making that sound?
GRUMBLE GRUMBLE
I looked down, err it turned out to be my stomach. Yup, I think I was too hungry because that morning I did not eat anything. I looked around, and I saw Sarah, Annie, Karina, Dea was talking in a corner, so I walked onto them.
I cannot read because I'm too hungry... I thought to myself
"Sar, aku nggak bisa laper soalnya aku laper." I said to Sarah which means "Hey Sarah, I cannot go hungry because I'm hungry."
Sarah opened her mouth out wide, confused "Huh?"
And I did the exact same thing as Sarah did "Huh?"
"What did you say?" she said, and the she laughed out loud
"What's wrong with you Putri? hahaha!" Annie laughed too
I grinned, and laughed with them.
"Dunno. I was intending to say 'I cannot read the book because I'm hungry.' But why I said that?" I laughed again.

So that concludes that I was crazy, insane for that day.

Hha ditimpuk

2008-12-01T16:34:00.003+08:00

-----------------------------------------
MACBETH I am afraid to think what I have done;
Look on't again I dare not.
LADY MACBETH Infirm of purpose!
Give me the daggers. The sleeping and the dead
Are but as pictures; 'tis the eye of childhood
That fears a painted devil. If he do bleed
I'll gild the faces of the grooms withal;
For it must seem their guilt.

William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616)
English poet and playwright.
-----------------------------------------
Yeah, I know tomorrow will be the first day of the FINAL EXAM. *kicks on the head* I CAN'T STUDY AT ALL! I CAN'T CONCENTRATE! *cries* DANG. SHIT. FUCK.

Well ==" argh. just let it be. I'll just study later on this night :P. I hope I CAN study :((. This is really a bad day for me. A heck hell of a day. I just remembered a while ago, I have a course at some place. And the teacher was really err... crazy? over confident?

the teacher: (he spoke in indonesian of course.) Hey, do you guys now a song by Project Pop that has the shaking-shaking? (Project Pop is a singing group with funny songs)
me: Huh?
the teacher: yeah, the one who... *starts singing dangdut* (and HELL. his singing was like HELL. And FYI, Project Pop does not sing dangdut AT ALL.)
me and my bff: HUH? What the?
me: You mean dangdut is my country?
the teacher: nooo! you know *starts singing again*
me: whatever.

in the middle of the lesson, he started telling his own past. Yeah, I mean it's fine. But it's in the middle of the lesson, HELLO? His sound was very high. I mean VERY high. Do you know AKON? yeah. he was the exact opposite of him. And do you know what's worse? HE THOUGHT HIS SINGING IS GREAT! Fuck. He sang some freaking songs that I do not even know. Or maybe even he made it himself up. If his voice was great, yeah it was fine. but his singing wass only like a sound that could crash my eardrums. Thank GOD he stopped it.

Anyways, I HATE FREAKING TEST! @#$@$%!

Talking about studying, now when I study, instead of having those lessons inside my head I start to daydream. I don't know why but now this has become a habit. Not only that, I often fall asleep when I start to read my book lessons.So yeah, I was remembering my past events when I was talking with my friends today, and I remembered I missed my brother in Jakarta. I kicked, I slapped, I shouted, I MADE him being accused guilty by my mom even though I'M THE ONE who was at fault. LOL. Yeah, even though I hate him so much, and I want to take my revenge one him, BWAHAHAHAHA! But I do miss and I do love one thing only at him. I can make him look guilty instead of me =)). Yeah as for example, I did this a few months ago. I used way too much quota and passed my bandwidth. My mom went angry at me, and coincidentally he was in here and COINCIDENTALLY he used the internet too.

mom: Why did you pass the limit again? Do you know how much I have to pay? *glares at me*
me: err, noo?
mom: WHAT? How could you say that?
*my brother passes and looked at me and smirked*
*I felt offended even though it's my own fault*
me: *points at him* HE'S THE ONE WHO'S BEEN USING THE INTERNET!
mom: *glares angrily and instantly at my brother* YOU!
brother: *opens the mouth wide up, confused* HUH?
mom: Don't use your sisters internet again!
brother: WHAT? *shocked*
me: *evil smirks*
brother: *stares at me, then back to my mother* But but but, I only used it once!
me: Yes you did. But you used it so much even though it was just once!
brother: no!
mother: just don't use it anymore!
me: *runs away*
brother: @#$%!

and the next day he chased me all over the house and kicked me. Of course, I fought well :P.

PS: Today I read a book entitled KAMBINGJANTAN. It's a blog that is published into book based on reality life. And it was really funny and I laughed out loud! LOL =))
Moral value: I laughed till my stomach hurts so much, and I DID NOT study at all. Thanks DICKa :P. Btw, I say assignments almost the same way you did, lol. I didn't know that you call assignments ass. I call it assies, lol.

Oh, and for you my honey :),
I LOVE U DEAR! :-*

Wish me luck on my studies and exams :)

What an ASS.

2008-11-20T19:38:00.004+08:00

-------------------------

FOOL He's mad that trusts in the tameness of a wolf, a horse's health, a boy's love, or a whore's
oath.

William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616)

English poet and playwright.

King Lear, Act 3, Scene 6

-------------------------

ARGHH! I'm so frustrated. Why should I love him? Why should I love anyone, but him? Argh. I really despise him. Why he's so cold, yet sometimes he's so nice? I can't stand this anymore. I want to forget about him but I can't! Every time I want to forget about him, he always does things that make me love him again. WHY? FUCK. ASSHOLE.

That's it. I'm going to end this right here, right now. I'll really forget about him. I'm serious. I won't hope, I won't pray for him anymore. If he suffers, let him be. I don't want to know any single thing about him anymore. Or else, that will only make me love him again and despise him more because I love him ;(. I'm really through with this. I don't want to be hurt more than this. This is enough. With this amount of hurting I can still do fine. But more? No. I'm not that strong. I DO NOT have a thousand of patience. I'm not GOD who has mercy. I'm human. And I'm a woman. I don't need a boy right now. I don't need love. I don't need to be loved. I just need my life. I just need to be strong :(.

Hey, If YOU read this, and realize that I'm talking about you, get a hold of yourself, will you? Don't be over confident just because I love you. Ooops, my mistake: JUST BECAUSE I LOVED YOU. PLEASE, I beg you. If you really do not love me, PLEASE just stay away from me. Don't always stares at me. I mean if you do that, you only gives me a false hope. But if you do love me ;) well, I think it's too late. I'm really fed up with these. I'm fed up with how jealous I am when you're so close with those girls. Or even 'a certain girl' that always close to you, and me? I'm just so far away from you. So FUCK with it. I know I'm not daring enough. But hey, that's the real me. If you don't like it, then DON'T MIND IT. Do you know how I hated 'a certain girl' that always teases me with you? I mean, I hate to be teased that way.

She's a bitch. A real time whore. No offense, but that's the truth. Do you know what did she say to me this afternoon? I was just joking with Al, which is not a real name of course, and she said to me 'Oh, jadinya sekarang kamu ngincer Al, bukannya Ryo?' Ryo is a false name I gave to the one I loved. So basically in English, what she just said was 'So, now you're aiming on Al, not aiming on Ryo?'. Can you believe it? She just said to me that points out I'm a bitch. I'm a slut who always aiming on boys. Isn't it supposed to be HER? I was so furious at her, then I just walked outside. I didn't say a single thing to her, I just walked outside. She begged for an apology. Sorry, but NO. So, just go out with her. Don't mind me. You don't love me right? Just love her.

Welcome :)

2008-11-16T13:45:00.007+08:00

--------------------

GUILDENSTERN Dreams indeed are ambition.
For the very substance of the ambitious is merely the shadow of a dream.

William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616)

English poet and playwright.

Hamlet, Act 2, Scene 2

--------------------

Irrashaimase!

Here, I welcome you to my blog site. You can just call me Natsuki, Nats, Nuts, Mist.Arisu, or even Nutsy :) Well, I'm just an ordinary-typical junior high school girl. I'm an Indonesian, to be exact, I live in Bali. No, I'm not Balinese. I have mixed blood from all over Indonesia. So you can just say I'm an Indonesian. Not Balinese, Sundanese, Sumatranese, or Betawinese *FYI, these are some races in Indonesia*.
04.28.94
Yep, that's the exact date when I was born into this world, this cutie me *got kicked on the head*. So, until this posting I'm approximately fourteen years, six months, and twelve days old. I love, pawn anime and manga<3
What type?
Well if you ask me, I LOVE any type! XDXDXD Especially, they have to be special, unique, out-of-the ordinary, and fabulous! I HATE characters that are weak, clingy, always say 'NO, I CAN'T', especially the girls. I mean, that's just SUCKS. FUCK with it. I don't know why, I just want to slap them on the face whenever I see them, even though I know it's impossible, because they're just fictional. But it really ruins my mood :( I mean, they even not trying, and do not see how they make everyone around them get a lot of problems. Whenever I see girl like that in an anime or manga, I STOP instantly reading it. And I WOULD never ever read it again, except if the plot/one of the character is too good for me to miss XD, ROFL. If you just wanna talk about it, feel free to add me up :3. I love another books too, such as novels. I also love movies, cartoons *western cartoons*, music *especially J-pop*. If I think it all over again, I just LOVE everything! XD FYI, I'm NOT gonna post all about anime and manga such in here. I'll mix it up, because hey, I have a lot to tell besides anime and manga :).
So, it's just based on my mood. Basically, I'm a really moody and temperamental person. Yeah, I know that sucks.
But, hey :3 I have nice sides too *gets kicked on the head*

So guys, comments are really-really appreciated :3 Ciaooo~

take my soul, take my heart back.

Halo

Typography.

ditto ditto

I need a superhero.

The sun has abandoned me.

what a day.

birthdays.

suckss

.

It's been a long time.

Tired

Gosh

At Last!

Stories

Internet Sucks :/

YEAH!

Chem Oh Chem

Pheeew

Addiction

Re-start, Re-fresh... whatever it is

Nakayoshi's New Series

Quick Update

Boys Before Flowers OST 1, 2, 2.5

♥Addiction to South Korea♥

Whee

Midnight

Hahaha

Pink is my life!

Some New Things

Sick.

WTF

Gah,

Wow.

Cool X3

IT'S HOLEEEHDAAAAY!

Dizzy.

Great Websites

A Poem

Love Story

Bored

Well...

My Blog's Affiliate Logo

50 Questions About Me

...

Bulbo

Some People Are Just Assholes.

School: What A HELL.

Merah dan Hitam

Insanity, loves it :3

Hha *ditimpuk*

What an ASS.

Welcome :)

Hha ditimpuk